Don't know why this month happen a lot of things...Every things also end up unhappily.....Today is the worst day of my life.......My mood and feeling now is like falling down from heaven to hell, burning by fire, suffer the hurt and sadness, my heart almost broke into half.....Is this a test for me from the God to let me going through all this kind of sadness? Then I would like to ask back, why You want to create a thing in our mind and feeling call friendship? You let people gain it, then suddenly took it back from them....This kind of treatment really very hurt especially when someone had treat a person as his best friend, become his own brother, an important person in his life....Am I not worth to have it? Since from childhood, my mom told me that God say my hold life don't have good relationship in between friends. None of them will treat you as an important friend to them.....But I always believe that if i treat people well enough, give out what i have to them, i'm sure one day they will notice me....Almost 21 years i had such believe, however today it let me notice that i was being so stupid for all this years....I finally notice that the people i treat as brother actually do not know much of me, just a simple question already can test it out; just a simple conversation already know how they don't wan to concern; some even pretend i even not exists and finally the most heart break one is that he cant listen to what i say although i beg him for only just this time....Now i finally know a person life and faith in already mend what you are and how you will face your life... Nothing can against faith....What a stupid boy, always think that you so important in your so call brother, you think you so powerful to ask people to do something....HAHAHAHA...very funny.....You just an ordinary friend in their heart. My sister always say to me that all my so call friends only will notice me when they need me to help them. After that who is Wesley they also can say I don't know this person. This is what she saw from me for all this year...But i keep my principles....Now i really sorry for not listen to you....last time sadness, you also the one who make me be open on it....This time not so dare to tell you again, scare you will slap me then......But what i can say is I will wake up starting from now and do what should I do..What i want say to him I already said. I keep on concern for what, he won't remember of what i said maybe already forget of what i said...He change his mind i will so happy but he really give up like that, this is the last time i will bother him as my bro...I don't want let him hurt me for the 3rd time...My sickness for this time is the deed i pay him back. No more again.......Sorry friends, I cant stand for it. When we have chance to meet again, maybe we only suitable to be just an ordinary friend. Please forgive me......
